PAINTING STUDIO First Annual International Garlic Clove Award For Scammers And Spammers by Stephen Craig Rowe

     I don’t know about you but as of late the Nigerian spammers have been quite active in my email inbox.  The Rev. Dr. Kingfish Moomongoobo and others with similar names have been getting very creative in the scam department.  Yes, I actually open and read the emails before sending them to the scam bin and find them to be very funny.  A week ago or so one of these clowns pretended to be the Director Of The FBI and another posed as head of the International Monatary Fund, the fucundiary agent of a deceased oil exec, exotic lottery, the bank of MumboJumgo and other entities all wanting to give me millions and millions of USD’s.  Yeppers, USD is scam talk for United States Dollars.  One of the bleeding wankers even offered to send me 40,000 USD’s so I could travel to Africa and pick up my suitcase full of cash.  Yeah right, dude meet me at the airport.  Not.  I do find some of these pitches mildly amusing and others down right laugh out loud funny.  
      It is very difficult for me to believe that some actually fall for this crap and think that it is a real opportunity for instant wealth.  The clowns must make some hits while preying on the dumb and dumber or perhaps they have nothing better to do than make up this garbage.  At any rate here are a couple that I recently received:

 

     US FOREIGN AFFAIRS COMMISSION/WEST AFRICA MONETARY AGENCY

This is to inform you that the Regional/Federal GOVERNMENT of BENIN" had on Wednesday 3rd June agreed/approved to send the sum of $40,000.00 USD part payment out of total sum of $2,500,000.00 between this week/next to you. This payment mode agreement was SIGNED Wednesday by the above WEST AFRICA GOVERNMENT to see that they obeyed the current order from the America new President (Barrack Obama), which instructed that all American/European and African Citizens, Whose payment has been delayed in West Africa region due to one reason or the other should be paid the part payment their entitlement.

THE CURRENT AGREEMENT BETWEEN AMERICA AND WEST GOVERNMENT
Due to global economic crises and complain of lack of fund to execute this transaction, the sum of $40,000.00 USD only will be paying to you this/next week, furthermore the agreement has it that you must appear in person after you have received the $40,000.00 this week/next week, you will be financially equipped to fly down to West Africa state (Benin) to sign the clearance documents of your remain sum amount ($2,460,000.00 USD) and fly back with the money in cash to your country. In line with the agreement, you are to forward your full personal data to Mr Wilson Ajah" The payment committee chairman" for payment agreement form signed and indorse by the Supreme Court of West Africa as well as authentic legalization of your fund. Therefore you are advised to contact him immediately by email on: (wamagency04@sify.com)  for more information regarding this development. Do notify us immediately you received the part payment as we will be looking forward to hear from you.

Thank you,
Mr. Michael Chertoff.
Director, US/West Africa Committee.

 

You’re invited to:		CONTACT THE WESTERN UNION FOR YOUR PAYMENT.
By your host:		Pual Chika
Date:		Wednesday 12 August 2009
Time:		8:00 – 9:00  (GMT +00:00)
Street:		Dear Friend,Greetings! we have concoulded yesterday with the governor of eco bank here in benin republic that you should start receiving your paymenyt of $1.2M. USD through westerrn union money transfer from tomorrow,But you will be receiving $5000 usd only per a day , so you are advice to contact the western union operator Rev.Mike Ike, Right now contact him and re-confirm your information to him right away so that he will send you your money controll number of your first payment of $5000 for you to pick it up in any western union arround you . Here is there info Rev.Mike Ike His email…(eko.west.union01@live.fr) His phone..+229 938-937-84 And also here is the informations you need to send to him , your receiver’s name….. your country code your telephone number…..All this informations is to avoid sending your money to wrong person,yours in service. Mr.Pual Chika Ok one more: Hello Dear, Pardon me for not having the pleasure of knowing your Mind set before making you this offer as it is utterly Confidential and genuine by virtue of its nature. I write to solicit your assistance in a fund transfer deal involving US$3.5M.This fund has been stashed out of the excess profit made last year by my branch office of the International Commercial Bank which I am the Manager. I have already submitted an approved end of the year report for the year 2008 to my head office here in Accra-Ghana and they will never know of this excess. I have since then, placed this amount on a Non-Investment Account without a beneficiary. Upon your response, I will configure your name on our database as holder of the Non-Investment Account. I will then guide you on how to apply to my head office for the Account Closure/ bank-to-bank remittance of the funds to your designated bank account. If you concur with this proposal, kindly get back to me as I intend for you to retain 30% of the funds while 70% shall be for me. Please write me back through this e-mail: mgamba50@universia.es I await your response. With Regards, Mr.Konar Gamba See what I mean?  Keep on smiling and as ever be well, Stephen Craig Rowe